Tuesday, 22 April 2014

Top Ten Tuesday: Characters Who Make Me Want To Slap Them

 

Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly meme hosted at The Broke & The Bookish. Each week they host a different top ten topic.


FYI
I am ridiculously behind on replying to comments and visiting people back atm. Please forgive me, I got two new bookshelves and have been spending hours and hours, over the last few days, organising and reorganising them. I will get to them all on my week off, which starts on Thursday. WOOP, WOOP!!!



I was happy that we got to pick how we wanted to do this weeks topic. I decided to go with characters that Id really like to slap, and there are a ton. I am sure you all know the feeling well, of wanting to reach inside a book and slap the hell out of a character. It could be because they are pissing you off, are whining or are just completely infuriating. Surprisingly, the characters that I most want to slap are the ones I either really, really love or really, really hate. 


Bella Swan

Now I have read all four Twilight books, and I've enjoyed them to some extent but, my god, Bella Swan is one of THE WORST characters ever. She makes me want to bitch slap her all round the place. As far as annoying characters go, for me, Bella Swan will always be number one. She begins dating someone who is unsuited for her in every way, who's controlling and, quite frankly, really creepy. This guy is the perfect example of who NOT to date, so Bella deserves a slap for thinking he is perfect boyfriend material. Plus, she's ridiculously clumsy and spends all her time needing to be saved by Edward. Also, when she gets dumped she literally just curls up into a ball on the floor and stays there for hours. *vomits*



Lord Voldemort


Lord Voldemort is the perfect villain, and one that everyone can love to hate. I can't actually decide whether Voldemort requires a slap or if he just needs a hug, something he clearly didn't get enough of as a kid. He's a grown man who spends all of his time trying to kill a young boy. He's a malignant narcissist who is in need of years of therapy. I'd also recommend he see a plastic surgeon about that nose, he looks far too creepy without one. Then I could break it with the sheer force of my slap to his face. 
See... he craves the hugs. 


Katniss Everdeen

I know, shocking, but she makes the list. For the most part, Katniss Everdeen is the perfect heroine. She's strong, independent and manages to survive the Hunger Games, not one but twice. But she makes herself worthy of a slap for two reasons. Reason one is that she can be completely indecisive at times. Gale or Peeta, Peeta or Gale - just pick one, it's not as hard a decision as she makes out. Her constant flitting from one to the other gets really tiresome to read. Reason two is that she can be downright miserable at times. Why I understand that she had to kill people, watch friends die and go through the Hunger Games twice, she is still unbearably miserable - you survived, you're alive, so for f-sake live and maybe try smiling every once in a while. She's probably one of the most realistic heroines, she's affected by what she's seen and been through... but I want to slap a smile on her face all the same. 

emma stone animated GIF



America Singer


She makes the list because she is a huge annoyance as far as characters go. First, her name is America Singer and she's American and a singer... seriously? I want to slap her just for that. She's also infuriating because her situation isn't that bad and she whines far too much about it. Her brother wants to be a football player but, since he is in a caste system for the arts, he will not be able to pursue a career in it. America acts like this is the most tragic thing that could ever happen to anyone ever. If Katniss Everdeen could meet this girl, I am pretty sure she would slap her for me. 
America Singer... really?
Edward Cullen


Twilight is one of those phenomenons that left thousands of girls declaring which 'Team' they were on, but I've never been able to root for Jacob or Edward. I can merely suppress the urge to find a way to land myself inside the book so that I could finally get the pleasure of bitch slapping both of them. Edward is rather scary/creepy as far as male romantic leads go. Yes, he was turned into a vampire at seventeen, but he has still been alive for a hundred years and is, technically, an old man. So it's a little disturbing that he is a hundred year old man who is actively pursuing a relationship with a seventeen year old. He's also obsessive, controlling and possessive, and also thinks sneaking into someones room to watch them sleeping is perfectly normal. Nope, it's creepy; you require seven million slaps! 

Ronald Weasley


I LOVE RON! I think if I could marry a fictional character then I would definitely make that guy my husband. So it might seem weird that he is making this list, but that boy is definitely deserving of a slap. He was just so incredible slow when it came to Hermione and it drove me insane. It takes him seven years to finally realise his feelings for her.... seven years! Then he waits until they are in a battle, where they could potentially die, to actually make a move and express his feelings. Plus, his jealousy towards Harry and many of his actions in Deathly Hallows make him very worthy of a slap.





Tris Prior


I feel a little bad writing this after seeing the film because film Tris rocked! But book Tris... not so much. In book one she chooses to leave behind her family and picks Dauntless at her choosing ceremony. Dauntless is the faction of the brave, who thing jumping off movie trains and beating the crap out of each other is all kinds of fun. The fact is that Tris chose that for herself, and it was a sign that we had one brave, strong female lead. And that was what we got... for one book. But then Tris just becomes rather weak, miserable and whiny. She spends her time making rash, bad and completely stupid decisions that make me want to reach in and yank her out the book so that I can knock some sense into her. I was actually pleased with how Allegiant ended, it finally put a stop to her near constant whining! So, Tris Prior, your constant whining makes you ridiculously worthy of a big ol' slap. 




Jacob Black


If I could, I would probably have a list that was just full of characters from Twilight, quite a lot of them deserve to be on it. Jacob is on here for two important reasons, his pining for Bella and his imprinting on her infant daughter. Bella chose Edward, a crazy, possessive vampire, a clear sign that she is crazy and yet Jacob still wants to be with her. This goes on for four books, until finally he manages to move on. Hooray! But, wait a minute, he moves on to her infant baby, which is just weird. This is then accepted ridiculously quickly by Bella & Edward, another reason why they both deserve slaps. The characters of Twilight really need to learn to be with people who are closer to them in age. So, Jacob Black, your desire to one day be romantically involved with Bella's baby makes you completely worthy of the list. 

A small baby...

Harry Potter


I think the Harry Potter series is one that every person should read, but it is full of many annoying characters that you want to hit at times. Harry makes this list because when he hits his teenage years he becomes very self-centred and a bit too 'I'm the Chosen One and my life is so hard.' I'm sure having the pressure of saving the wizarding and Muggle world from Lord Voldemort must be pretty tough, but it's no excuse to be horrible to all the people around you. He shouts at his friends, who've stuck by him through everything, and generally makes out like he's doing all the hard work. I really wish Hermione or Ron had given him a good slap in book 5, he clearly deserved it. 






The Break-Up Artist by Philip Siegel: 3/5 Review
Five Friday Favourites: Villains
Storm by Brigid Kemmerer: DNF Review


48 comments:

  1. Some nice picks there! I couldn't help but laughing and agreeing with your Twilight ones. Very funny indeed! Have you seen the Buffy vs Edward video on my blog? It's in the sidebar. I love it! It's hilarious!

    For that matter as well, did you ever see Vampires Suck? It's a complete parody of the first two Twilight movies. Plus other popular movies, shows and whatnot at the time. It's hilarious! It's like the Scary Movie movies. Kind of pokes fun at it all, but it did bring up good points like the unhealthy obsession of loving a vampire or whatever. Need to watch that again myself! I need a good laugh!

    Here's my Tuesday Post

    Have a GREAT day!

    Old Follower :)

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    1. Yes I did, it made me laugh so much... I have watched it far too many times! I saw that on Netflix and had it on one day whilst I was cleaning, was very silly at times but had me laughing so hard at other points.

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  2. A lot of these books I haven't read, or have only read partially (like the Harry Potter's) but this was fun to read. I liked movie Tris a lot so if she gets whiny in books two and three that is disappointing. The more I hear the more curious I am about Allegiant, even though I've heard how it ends...

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    1. Movie Tris is really great, but book Tris just isn't anywhere near as good. And, my god, she becomes so whiny in books two and three that I want to strangle her to death.

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  3. This was a fun read. You don't need to slap Katniss - Joanna Mason did it for you. :) I've never read any of the Twilight books. I watched most of the first movie, and that was more than I could take. Ugh.

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    1. She did, but I kind of want the satisfaction of being able to do it myself. Those films are so bad that they make all other bad movies look good.

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  4. Hahaha I was going to call my list this too until I realised mine were more villainous and ones I love to hate as opposed to slap, but I'd include so many of these on a similar list. The ones who are slow to catch on that someone likes them, or who are super whiny, always make me want to slap them!

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    1. Yup, slow to catch on and absolutely whiny are the two things that make me really, really, really want to slap a character.

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  5. Oh wow I agree with ALL of these. I love Katniss but sometimes she was so stony, like she doesn't even understand emotions...
    I'd be too scared to slap Voldy though hahaha :D
    Jacob's pedophilia though... OMFG yes!
    Just a big yes in general!

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    1. I know, I am pretty sure she didn't have any emotions half of the time. I would probably be scared to slap him too, but part of me thinks he needs it and might appreciate it. But probably not.

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  6. This is a good list. I never could read Twilight just for all of those charactes' reasons. I love Harry Potter but I agree with your analysis. Definitely in book 5 Harry needed a slap. :)
    http://youmeandacupofteablog.blogspot.com/2014/04/top-ten-secondary-characters-who-i.html

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    1. You didn't miss out on anything, I sometimes wish that I could just unread them all.

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  7. Haha I love this! I agree with all these characters, ESPECIALLY all of the Twilight ones!

    My Top Ten

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  8. Love your topic! I haven't read The Selection so I can't speak for that character, but I totally feel you on some of these! Ron especially. As much as I love these books, I always feel a little relief when Ron leaves in the 7th one just because we get a little break from the whining! And I agree that movie Tris is way better than book Tris.

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    1. Movie Tris kicked some proper ass, loved her! Poor Ron, I love him but he was so hopeless at times.

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  9. I enjoyed your list. Lol, the Twilight characters are indeed a bunch. Jacob's imprinting on a baby is gross.

    And Ron.....sigh, it is frustrating for Hermione to have to endure the long wait!

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    1. I KNOW!!! Why did Meyer think that was a good idea??!??

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  10. We'd like to slap a lot of the same characters! I only read Divergent, but I was ready to give Tris a little wake up call in that book too. And the Hermione/Bella image rocks my socks off.

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    1. Well if book one Tris got to you, book two would drive you insane and book three Tris would make you want to kill her.

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  11. lololol I love this post! You totally cracked me up on so many of them. I agree with you on America Singer (that name is already worthy of a slap btw, but I guess that is not really her fault). She is especially annoying in Elite when she goes back and forth between Aspen and Max. I was basically enraged the whole book.

    Angel @ Spare Reads

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    1. America Singer? It still bugs the hell out of me! I was enraged that entire book two, she was so indecisive!

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  12. Ok, this post made my laugh. I pretty much agree with you on all of these. But poor American Singer, she didn't choose her name. :) ~Pam

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    1. She didn't... she did decide to be really annoying and make silly decisions!

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  13. Totally agree with those Twilight picks - so infuriating!

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    1. I know, that book is filled with characters I want to slap.

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  14. Oh My Goodness. I am so glad you stopped by and led me right back here! Not only were all of your characters ones that people universally love, (I think cus they have to or something) But I have read all of these books and am right there with you. Slapping them silly for all their numerous offenses! We are too alike, seriously!

    Great List!
    Thanks for stopping by and Happy Reading!

    Sash @ Disappear Into Reading

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    1. YAY!!! I am glad to find someone else who shares my opinions on characters that are in need of a good slap! And being late to reply means I can go check out your blog all over again, I'm sure it's been forever since I was there.

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  15. Hahaha! I love this list! I want to slap Harry and Ron as well, and lets just go ahead and throw rocks at the entire character list from Twilight. :) I'm so in!

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    1. Yes, we shall band together and throw rather large ones. Lets just grab some bricks and go crazy!!!

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  16. Great list!Totally agree with all of the characters you included...Especially Tris because she becomes a bit frustrating and the person we were introduced to in the beginning wasn't the same as in the other books!Thanks for stopping by my TTT earlier.Happy Reading!

    Elena @ Book Lady's Reviews

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    1. She really does become so frustrating the longer that series goes on. It made her go from one of my favourite heroines to one of my least favourite.

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  17. Love your list! I love the way you describe how annoying these characters can be. I love most of them like Tris, Katniss, Ron and Harry but they definitely need a wake up call somtimes. And America if I could I would have jumped right into the second book to smack her head against the wall just to get some sense into her. She was so annoying!
    Anyway great list and thanks for stopping by my blog!

    El @ So Bookalicious

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    1. I love Katniss, Ron and Harry but there are just times when those characters need a good ol' slap. America was such an annoying character, god that girl got on my nerves.

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  18. I love the topic you chose for your list! I may have to do one of them myself >.<
    I definitely agree with Harry Potter. That boy needs a good slapping, especially in The Order of the Phoenix. Yep, all the Twilight characters deserve slaps. (So does the author.) Bella is an insult to women everywhere and Twilight is an insult to literature. Can you tell I'm not a fan?

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    1. I think you should, it's quite therapeutic! I know, Order of the Phoenix is definitely the book where that boy needed a good ol' bitch slap!!!

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  19. Great list. There have been way too many characters worthy of a slap lately. NCIS' Gibbs needs to invade some books because he's so good at the head slap.

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    1. He should jump into all of these books for me then and get slapping!

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  20. Very funny - gave me a giggle, particularly Bella and Edward - yes they deserve a few slaps for sure!
    Lynn :D

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  21. Great list! I love the theme - we've all wanted to slap characters at one point or another. Harry Potter especially in Order of the Phoenix would make the top of any such list, I'm sure! I have not read any of the Twilight books and have only seen the first two movies, but Bella and Edward definitely deserve a place as well!

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    1. Haha, yup! That boy was so annoying during Order of the Phoenix.

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  22. THIS is why I never read Twilight. And never will.

    And gosh I agree about Harry Potter. I remember when I read book 5 a bunch of years ago I got so utterly annoyed by his whining. Definitely slap-deserving!

    Fantastic list!

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    1. Haha, book 5 was painful to get through because of that.

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  23. I love everything you said, espeically about Tris & Katniss. Awesome!

    Jo @ http://adreamfrommyheart.blogspot.com

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